When messaging someone for the first time it’s important to be polite, genuine, and engaging. Here’s a little guide to help you craft a great first message:
1. Start With a Friendly Greeting
• Open with a simple and warm salutation like “Hi [their name]” or “Hello there.”
• Avoid generic phrases like “Hey” or “Hi” alone—they can come off as uninspired.
Example:
“Hi Sarah, I hope your day is going well!”
2. Mention Something Specific From Their Profile
• Show you’ve read their profile by referencing something that caught your attention. It could be a shared interest, a unique detail, or something they’re passionate about.
• Avoid overused compliments on appearance; focus on their personality, hobbies, or interests instead.
Example:
“I noticed you love hiking. Have you explored any good trails recently?”
3. Ask an Open-Ended Question
• Encourage them to respond by asking a question that can’t be answered with just “yes” or “no.”
• Keep it light and positive.
Example:
“I see you love trying out new coffee spots—do you have a favorite place you’d recommend?”
4. Keep It Brief and Polite
• Your first message should be concise, ideally 2-3 sentences. Avoid overwhelming them with too much information or personal stories.
• Respect their time and ensure the tone is warm and courteous.
Example:
“Hi James, I loved reading your profile. Your interest in photography is so cool! What inspired you to get started?”
5. Be Genuine and Respectful
• Avoid using overly flirtatious or suggestive language in your initial message.
• Be authentic in your tone, and don’t try to impress by exaggerating or being someone you’re not.
Example:
“Hi Mia, I’m really impressed by your passion for volunteering. What’s been the most rewarding experience for you?”
6. Avoid Common Pitfalls
• Don’t Copy-Paste Messages: Personalize each message for the recipient.
• Avoid Overthinking: It’s okay if your message isn’t perfect. What matters most is sincerity.
• Don’t Make Assumptions: Let their profile guide the conversation rather than jumping to conclusions.
By being thoughtful, approachable, and genuine, you increase your chances of making a good impression and sparking a meaningful conversation.
If things go well, ask them if they would be interested in doing a quick virtual date coming up soon to see each other on camera!
Also, remember if you are truly that nervous or shy to reach out, just send them a premade intro message. It’s the little smiley face icon on the face of their profile. It will do a drop-down menu. You just pick one and hit send it’s better than not sending a message at all!
Stephanie